Hollay
12-21-2005, 10:30 AM
Thanks to everyone for their submissions. The finalists this week have two very similar and very different poems.
It's gonna be a tough call, but as poker players, we're used to that. :silly:
Vote for your favorite and you're automatically entered into a draw to win Hollywood Poker gear.
The person who's entry receives the most votes will win a tournament ticket that can be used for the Michael Woods Celebrity Invitational or the Hollywood Poker Celebrity Classic.
There will be no Write to Win next week, but if you want to get a head start on a submission for the first week of January, please e-mail your entry to me at hollay@hollywoodpoker.com. The topic is posted at the bottom of this thread.
Entry #1
Christmas Big Deal
‘Twas the Night Before Christmas,
I was a little bit soused
When my measly two pair
met up with a full house
The chips in the center
Of my No-Limit Table’d
Be stacked by the winner
Myself severely disabled
This was my regular
Saturday night home game
Christmas Eve or no
We played it just the same
My wife and my children
All tucked in up the stair
Had given up hope
Santa’d ever come there
The money for gifts
Was now all in play
Converted to chips
And swiftly going away
Pizza boxes and beer cans
Decked out mid the décor
Of holly and lights
on a tree ceiling to floor
And way up on top
Was a bright Christmas star
Empty stockings all hung
On the place with the fire
The cards now reshuffled
Hole cards dealt out with care
My chip stack was dwindling
Near the ol’ chip and a chair
When to my wonderin’ eyes
Appeared in my pocket
To my utter surprise
a rocket on rocket
And though I was feeling
A little bit tired
My mind started in reeling
From my two Aces wired
The blinds now in place
The bet came my way
I was in early position
So I had to slow play
I watched and I waited
The small blind limped in
Then a test raise was baited
Smooth called all around again
The flop was a godsend
Worth more than gold
An ace and two kings
Though I thought all would fold
But what would be sweet
I couldn’t have known
Until after the hand
When all cards were shown
Two seats to my left
Had pocket tens in his craw
The seat to my right
Had jack queen and a draw
And the guy on the button
Had four to the flush
Just talking about it
Still gives me a rush
The turn brought a ten
Jack/queen bet his straight
I smoothed called again
Aces full was gonna be great
The presents I will buy
Would put poor Santa to shame
I’ll show my disgruntled wife
I was right not to cancel this game
Then a funny thing happened
The big blind pushed it all in
But I saw his tell
He revealed a slight grin
I knew right away
This was a big bluff
By the big blind
And I’d had quite enough
I had him covered
So I confidently called
But what happened next
Left me quite appalled
The bet was raised ‘round the table
All In’s again and again
With every chip that was able
Soon into this pot . . . when
Came 5th Street, the river
It was a spade ten
With the chips all committed
It was a done deal by then
The only thing left
Was to turn over our cards
As the faces turned sickly
One by one breaking their hearts
The straight beat by the flush
The flush beat by the house
Kings full of Aces
Boy, did he ever grouse
When my Aces full
Put him in his place
Such a broad smile
Now filled my whole face
I couldn’t believe the luck
That just happened to me
When out of the blue
Four tens did I see
He jumped up for joy
But was soon takin’ aback
When the big blind turned over
Another queen and a jack
They were both black
Each of them was a spade
Matched Ace, king, ten on the board
His Royal was made
He’d called us with that?
Was he really that thick?
Then it suddenly hit
For me there’d be no Saint Nick
My wife would loudly exclaim
As I drove outta sight
She’d be changing’ her name
After the custody fight
So if your home game
Falls on a Christmas Eve
Better to play Santa
Then Aces full . . .
and forever have to leave.
~Al N Smithee
Entry #2
A POKER NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,
The only sound to be heard was the clicking of a mouse.
My stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes St. Nick would bring me more than a pair.
The children were nestled all snug in their bed,
While visions of quad-aces danced in my head.
My wife in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down with a keyboard in my lap.
When out on the lawn there rose such a clatter,
I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew in a rush,
Abandoning my draw for a straight-flush.
The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow,
Informed me my cards had no hope to grow.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh holding cases of beer.
With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers came,
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name.
Now Windows, now Apple, now Mac, now Dell,
Grant poker players serene faces without a tell.
To the top of the porch, and the top of the wall,
Now dash away, dash away their fear to call.
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricanes fly,
Cast away their need to ever have to rebuy.
So up to the housetop the little sleigh flew,
With all of its goodies, and St. Nicholas too.
And then in a twinkling, I heard up on the roof,
The pouring of whiskey that was one hundred proof.
Santa needed something to help ward off the chill,
And a pint of Jack Daniels certainly filled the bill.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney he came with a drunken bound.
He was dressed all in faux-fur from head to foot,
And his clothes were covered in liquor-soaked soot.
A bundle of goodies he had flung on his back,
And he looked strung out, and ‘bout ready to crack.
His eyes were blood-shot, with pupils like cherries,
But all of the booze had made him jolly and merry.
His droll little face was all drawn up and drained,
And the beard on his chin was nicotine stained.
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And new Reebok sneakers encircled his feet.
He had a broad face, and a flabby round belly,
Evidence he ate donuts with calorie-rich jelly.
Even though he was chubby, he was a jolly old soul,
And I hoped he’d brought me more than a lump of coal.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon let me know I had nothing to dread.
He danced a little jig all ‘round my tree,
Then laughed out loud as he slapped his knee.
He rubbed my computer with a hand stubby and round,
Indicating that’s where my gifts would soon be found.
He spoke not a word, and went straight to his task,
And filled every ones’ stocking without my having to ask.
Then, laying his finger along side his nose,
He staggered to the chimney and up he rose.
He sprang to his sleigh and gave out a whistle,
And shot into the air like a Titan missile.
I heard him exclaim as he left the way he came,
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, now get back to your game!
~one eyed cat
Topic for first week in January: New Years Resolutions.
It's gonna be a tough call, but as poker players, we're used to that. :silly:
Vote for your favorite and you're automatically entered into a draw to win Hollywood Poker gear.
The person who's entry receives the most votes will win a tournament ticket that can be used for the Michael Woods Celebrity Invitational or the Hollywood Poker Celebrity Classic.
There will be no Write to Win next week, but if you want to get a head start on a submission for the first week of January, please e-mail your entry to me at hollay@hollywoodpoker.com. The topic is posted at the bottom of this thread.
Entry #1
Christmas Big Deal
‘Twas the Night Before Christmas,
I was a little bit soused
When my measly two pair
met up with a full house
The chips in the center
Of my No-Limit Table’d
Be stacked by the winner
Myself severely disabled
This was my regular
Saturday night home game
Christmas Eve or no
We played it just the same
My wife and my children
All tucked in up the stair
Had given up hope
Santa’d ever come there
The money for gifts
Was now all in play
Converted to chips
And swiftly going away
Pizza boxes and beer cans
Decked out mid the décor
Of holly and lights
on a tree ceiling to floor
And way up on top
Was a bright Christmas star
Empty stockings all hung
On the place with the fire
The cards now reshuffled
Hole cards dealt out with care
My chip stack was dwindling
Near the ol’ chip and a chair
When to my wonderin’ eyes
Appeared in my pocket
To my utter surprise
a rocket on rocket
And though I was feeling
A little bit tired
My mind started in reeling
From my two Aces wired
The blinds now in place
The bet came my way
I was in early position
So I had to slow play
I watched and I waited
The small blind limped in
Then a test raise was baited
Smooth called all around again
The flop was a godsend
Worth more than gold
An ace and two kings
Though I thought all would fold
But what would be sweet
I couldn’t have known
Until after the hand
When all cards were shown
Two seats to my left
Had pocket tens in his craw
The seat to my right
Had jack queen and a draw
And the guy on the button
Had four to the flush
Just talking about it
Still gives me a rush
The turn brought a ten
Jack/queen bet his straight
I smoothed called again
Aces full was gonna be great
The presents I will buy
Would put poor Santa to shame
I’ll show my disgruntled wife
I was right not to cancel this game
Then a funny thing happened
The big blind pushed it all in
But I saw his tell
He revealed a slight grin
I knew right away
This was a big bluff
By the big blind
And I’d had quite enough
I had him covered
So I confidently called
But what happened next
Left me quite appalled
The bet was raised ‘round the table
All In’s again and again
With every chip that was able
Soon into this pot . . . when
Came 5th Street, the river
It was a spade ten
With the chips all committed
It was a done deal by then
The only thing left
Was to turn over our cards
As the faces turned sickly
One by one breaking their hearts
The straight beat by the flush
The flush beat by the house
Kings full of Aces
Boy, did he ever grouse
When my Aces full
Put him in his place
Such a broad smile
Now filled my whole face
I couldn’t believe the luck
That just happened to me
When out of the blue
Four tens did I see
He jumped up for joy
But was soon takin’ aback
When the big blind turned over
Another queen and a jack
They were both black
Each of them was a spade
Matched Ace, king, ten on the board
His Royal was made
He’d called us with that?
Was he really that thick?
Then it suddenly hit
For me there’d be no Saint Nick
My wife would loudly exclaim
As I drove outta sight
She’d be changing’ her name
After the custody fight
So if your home game
Falls on a Christmas Eve
Better to play Santa
Then Aces full . . .
and forever have to leave.
~Al N Smithee
Entry #2
A POKER NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house,
The only sound to be heard was the clicking of a mouse.
My stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes St. Nick would bring me more than a pair.
The children were nestled all snug in their bed,
While visions of quad-aces danced in my head.
My wife in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down with a keyboard in my lap.
When out on the lawn there rose such a clatter,
I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew in a rush,
Abandoning my draw for a straight-flush.
The moon on the breast of the new fallen snow,
Informed me my cards had no hope to grow.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh holding cases of beer.
With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers came,
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name.
Now Windows, now Apple, now Mac, now Dell,
Grant poker players serene faces without a tell.
To the top of the porch, and the top of the wall,
Now dash away, dash away their fear to call.
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricanes fly,
Cast away their need to ever have to rebuy.
So up to the housetop the little sleigh flew,
With all of its goodies, and St. Nicholas too.
And then in a twinkling, I heard up on the roof,
The pouring of whiskey that was one hundred proof.
Santa needed something to help ward off the chill,
And a pint of Jack Daniels certainly filled the bill.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney he came with a drunken bound.
He was dressed all in faux-fur from head to foot,
And his clothes were covered in liquor-soaked soot.
A bundle of goodies he had flung on his back,
And he looked strung out, and ‘bout ready to crack.
His eyes were blood-shot, with pupils like cherries,
But all of the booze had made him jolly and merry.
His droll little face was all drawn up and drained,
And the beard on his chin was nicotine stained.
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And new Reebok sneakers encircled his feet.
He had a broad face, and a flabby round belly,
Evidence he ate donuts with calorie-rich jelly.
Even though he was chubby, he was a jolly old soul,
And I hoped he’d brought me more than a lump of coal.
A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon let me know I had nothing to dread.
He danced a little jig all ‘round my tree,
Then laughed out loud as he slapped his knee.
He rubbed my computer with a hand stubby and round,
Indicating that’s where my gifts would soon be found.
He spoke not a word, and went straight to his task,
And filled every ones’ stocking without my having to ask.
Then, laying his finger along side his nose,
He staggered to the chimney and up he rose.
He sprang to his sleigh and gave out a whistle,
And shot into the air like a Titan missile.
I heard him exclaim as he left the way he came,
MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, now get back to your game!
~one eyed cat
Topic for first week in January: New Years Resolutions.